27 Comments
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Heartfelt Boundaries's avatar

Love this intro and I’m totally onboard for the long-haul! Thanks for this! 💙

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Thank you!!! I appreciate that.

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Jodi Oliver's avatar

Cody--love what you are doing here. As a trauma counselor and relationship trauma coach, I know you must name what is happening to heal. You allow people to name it out loud, and that matters. Too many counselors don't get it--and too many aren't able to decipher covert abuse in all its forms, from boardroom to bedroom. In addition, we must know that psychological flexibility is healing--we don't ever graduate from the process; we learn to walk with it hand in hand while pursuing what matters most.

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Thank you Jodi! Yeah I got on here roughly 3 weeks ago and started posting my writings. I have been really happy to see other people can connect with it or relate.

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Jodi Oliver's avatar

I just started recently as well, and I find that like-minded passionate healers find each other! Again, I am truly and profoundly saddened that many in my profession do not get it. Without empathy, openness, and self-awareness, they will harm greatly. Keep writing!

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Ms. Maine's avatar

Cody, this is not just a welcome—it’s a wake-up. A reclamation. A mirror for those of us who’ve smiled through meetings and quietly unraveled after. You’ve put words to what so many of us carry but rarely say out loud.

Thank you for naming the spaces between high-performance and hidden pain. For refusing to sugarcoat survival. And for building something that doesn’t coddle but calls.

This space is necessary. This voice—your voice—is needed. We hear you. And we’re with you.

—Girl, Why | Girl, Yes.

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Thank you!!!

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euni's avatar

This was great. I deeply understand this both in myself and in the people I’ve worked with over the years. Also, sending this to my therapist and dad, haha 😆

Thanks so much for the work you share, Cody. I’d love to invite you to have a chat with me in the fall on my podcast (currently rebranding) if that’s something that aligns for you. 🙏🏽

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Kathy H's avatar

Just received misdiagnosis again, trying AGAIN when I had been gaslit for decades seeking help while being high-functioning. I agree there isn't any being well in the same dysfunctional bypassing systems of abuse. No problem is fixed without being very clear & naming the problem. The silence must be broken.

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The Mystic Rose's avatar

Wow! I would love to meet you!

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Still Waters by Bridget Claire's avatar

THIS: “Healing is staying awake, staying connected to yourself, and not letting the old patterns sneak back in when you're tired or vulnerable.”

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Still Waters by Bridget Claire's avatar

I can do that. Why didn’t anyone tell me that it wouldn’t take years and years and tens of thousands of dollars of four different types of therapy just to “begin the process”?

I know it’s a lifelong journey, but you don’t exactly graduate from Healing College and then take the GMAT to apply for a graduate degree program at The University of Healing, College of Business & Bullshit. Am I supposed to bankrupt myself in order one day, many years from now, wake up to find myself feeling “Healed” or has the concept adapted to pop psych talk oversimplified then transformed into something ubiquitous as Wellness Culture’s newest cash cow?

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driverlessinthecity's avatar

Love how you’re being real. Just started out here as a transit advocate/ enthusiast sharing transit stories

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Yael Reinhardt-Matsliah's avatar

Powerful intro! No fluff bullshit here, just raw, real, hard core words to help all of us KILL THE SILENCE.

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Grounded Spirituality_Candice's avatar

Thank you for taking a stand on all of the above. There are many people out there who manipulate others in order to gain something for themselves. And it is time to take a stand against this.

While my experience is different, I experienced being silenced and manipulated - ultimately I would question myself consistently. (Gas lighting as we label it) I saw these cycles happen in a few areas of my life. It required me to look at each one of them and disconnect from the energy hold they had.

While it’s always a work in progress - it is having conversations like this that help continue this healing process.

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Candice, I appreciate you saying this.

That self-doubt you talk about — that's the real weapon they use. It's not the big betrayals. It's the slow, steady grind that makes you question your own instincts until you don't even recognize yourself.

And you're right. Once you wake up to it, you see the same pattern everywhere. Different faces, same game.

It’s always a process. It doesn’t just go away because you know better now. Healing is staying awake, staying connected to yourself, and not letting the old patterns sneak back in when you're tired or vulnerable.

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Grounded Spirituality_Candice's avatar

Also, unrelated but would love to know what you used for the audio.. newbie here to Substack…

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Kill The Silence's avatar

I used Descript. It’s pretty straightforward and easy to learn. Which I needed LOL

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Grounded Spirituality_Candice's avatar

lol same thanks!

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Grounded Spirituality_Candice's avatar

You said this so well. And the reminder not to allow it back in👏🏼

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Michael Berger, LSW's avatar

Love the no BS approach

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Thank you Michael. I'm trying to be as authentically me as I can here.

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Michael Berger, LSW's avatar

Also, did you write about those experiences in more detail? Those stories sound intense! What you have been through is no joke. Especially the therapist taking advantage of you in a vulnerable spot.

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Yes I did. I plan to publish that. I’m still in the middle of it. I just filed the complaint mid March. Attorneys. The whole nine yards.

I will keep writing about it as I go along. When its all over I plan to use the real names. For now, I have to legally protect myself.

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Michael Berger, LSW's avatar

That makes total sense!

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Roberto Leo's avatar

Waoo… we are talking the same language.

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Kill The Silence's avatar

Thank you Roberto! I look forward to reading your stuff.

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