. . . The honesty and the connection. I have lived bits of your story and know the continued challenges. Reading your story helped me to 7nderstand mine better
lucky for me, my adhd brain always finds its way to your work despite the platform. thank you for always offering the rawest material when were stuck in a superficial world. prayers for you always friend 💜🩵
As someone who often struggles with similar issues, the app Finch has been helpful. it's very kind and gentle about setting small goals for yourself and (I believe) gives you dopamine for checking them complete because your birb gets points towards the daily adventure of exploring cities around the world.
You don't have to try it if it sounds silly to you but I am compulsively helpful with my parasocial people and it might help someone else who reads this.
I totally relate. Something that’s helped me a lot is the boring maintenance stuff is this app called streaks. It’s not perfect and I mess it up sometimes, but it has helped me tremendously. I mention it in case it could be helpful to you or another reader :-)
You are my influencer ! You wrote, “And I want you to do your thing too. Whatever it is. Whatever you’ve been avoiding. Whatever scares you. Whatever you really want. Let’s all fucking improve. Let’s go after what scares us”. That lite up some neurons that were lying dormant in my brain. So, I did a public demonstration of evidential mediumship today, and I brought through a woman’s deceased brother who had taken his own life. He gave me his name and exact evidence about who he was and why he wanted to communicate. Which really had an impact on the recipient who was totally his best friend when he was here, and hugely impacted the 30 or so people in the audience. He made me feel that he always thought he had to be better, and he couldn’t just be himself as he was. His message was poignant. And if I hadn’t read your article, if I hadn’t decided to just do public mediumship and face being public with this gift, then that beautiful soul from the spirit side of life might not have been able to communicate with his sister some very comforting and astounding truths. Do you see where this is going? Ripples, Cody, fucking ripples out into the cosmos.
If I might share a couple of things I have found helpful:
I began taking a bottle to bed. 😆 A water bottle. I drink 1/2 right before I turn off the light. I wake up at a given interval because I have to pee. After I pee, I drink the rest of the water. I will automatically reach for more water all day long, without even thinking about it.
I move for 10 minutes after every meal. What I do varies from day to day; and, if I miss one, I'll eat again eventually and have another opportunity. So no guilt.
These are not rules.
They are habits that help me be the person I want to be.
I saw myself in your words. This “I won’t take care of myself because I am not worth it. I haven’t done my job, etc”. The idea of conditional love to self. Wow!
Thanks Cody! There is no easy answer or easy way. Thank you for being real. For sharing where you are right now. It's hard. It's harder and then it's hard all over again. As you said, do the scared anyways! Whatever our scared is all we need to do is try
I am blown away. This touched me deeply
. . . The honesty and the connection. I have lived bits of your story and know the continued challenges. Reading your story helped me to 7nderstand mine better
lucky for me, my adhd brain always finds its way to your work despite the platform. thank you for always offering the rawest material when were stuck in a superficial world. prayers for you always friend 💜🩵
As someone who often struggles with similar issues, the app Finch has been helpful. it's very kind and gentle about setting small goals for yourself and (I believe) gives you dopamine for checking them complete because your birb gets points towards the daily adventure of exploring cities around the world.
You don't have to try it if it sounds silly to you but I am compulsively helpful with my parasocial people and it might help someone else who reads this.
I did Finch for months after things went south for me last Fall. Very kind.
Then my PDA began feeling pressured, and I had to take a break.
I don't know much about PDA but I can see that from the little I do. Good luck with it and be kind to yourself.
Loved this!! I’m here if you want to talk about how to build that bridge 🤍
I totally relate. Something that’s helped me a lot is the boring maintenance stuff is this app called streaks. It’s not perfect and I mess it up sometimes, but it has helped me tremendously. I mention it in case it could be helpful to you or another reader :-)
You are my influencer ! You wrote, “And I want you to do your thing too. Whatever it is. Whatever you’ve been avoiding. Whatever scares you. Whatever you really want. Let’s all fucking improve. Let’s go after what scares us”. That lite up some neurons that were lying dormant in my brain. So, I did a public demonstration of evidential mediumship today, and I brought through a woman’s deceased brother who had taken his own life. He gave me his name and exact evidence about who he was and why he wanted to communicate. Which really had an impact on the recipient who was totally his best friend when he was here, and hugely impacted the 30 or so people in the audience. He made me feel that he always thought he had to be better, and he couldn’t just be himself as he was. His message was poignant. And if I hadn’t read your article, if I hadn’t decided to just do public mediumship and face being public with this gift, then that beautiful soul from the spirit side of life might not have been able to communicate with his sister some very comforting and astounding truths. Do you see where this is going? Ripples, Cody, fucking ripples out into the cosmos.
This: “consistency is torture”
I feel this too in so many areas of my own life.
If I might share a couple of things I have found helpful:
I began taking a bottle to bed. 😆 A water bottle. I drink 1/2 right before I turn off the light. I wake up at a given interval because I have to pee. After I pee, I drink the rest of the water. I will automatically reach for more water all day long, without even thinking about it.
I move for 10 minutes after every meal. What I do varies from day to day; and, if I miss one, I'll eat again eventually and have another opportunity. So no guilt.
These are not rules.
They are habits that help me be the person I want to be.
Hope that helps.
I saw myself in your words. This “I won’t take care of myself because I am not worth it. I haven’t done my job, etc”. The idea of conditional love to self. Wow!
Thanks Cody! There is no easy answer or easy way. Thank you for being real. For sharing where you are right now. It's hard. It's harder and then it's hard all over again. As you said, do the scared anyways! Whatever our scared is all we need to do is try
Thank you for sharing this, Cody, it’s so honest. Trauma doesn’t talk, it shouts, right?