I’m gonna be honest I couldn’t follow the whole story, but I got the general sentiment Cody and this is EXACTLY what I’m going through now being in a PhD program. It was this realization that Imbeing manipulated that subconsciously pushed me back to faith. I didn’t even realize it. And I now have a clarity that scares those who want to use me. Yet, I remain kind and gentle, because I can never allow this system to take away my softness, I can never ever allow it to brutalize me. Never. Ever ever.
I switched jobs 8 times in 10 years because of bosses like you described, Cody. They are almost everywhere.
I never engaged, I only observed, listened to others and then prepared my exit. It was exhausting, constantly starting over again.
One thing I observed at all of these employers: Those bosses and their bosses and HR, they are all in it together. It's them against everyone below them. They understand that they need to stick together, appear as one force. This way it is much harder for anyone to go after them.
A lot of them are grossly incompetent, but that's exactly why they are in those positions. They take instructions and will do anything, to stay in the position of power that they are in. Why? I think they know that they are incompetent, dumb and useless and that in nature they would never reach a level where they would be in charge of anything. They are the ones that get pushed around and pushed away, the bottom of the bottom feeders. But in the upside down world we are living in, those types of people always get promoted to the very top, because they are the most perfect puppets. They will do anything for having power over the people who they envy.
The only option I see for us people who know how to do actual work and achieve something, we also need to stick together. We also need to be one force. But not in a way where those two forces then collide. Then we would be like them. No, we need to be Trojan horses. Bullshit our ways to the very top. Those other folks need to think we are 100% one of them, no doubt in their minds. Then, once at the very top, we need to reveal our ture force and make them pay. They are prepared for a head on fight, not for a silent takeover behind the scenes.
Wow…just wow. Man, I love not being reliant on any substances. I love it more than words can say. I think it is far easier to maintain control over people who indulge in substances, even those that are prescribed by physicians. I had a shrink many years ago who prescribed Klonipin for anxiety. It served to anesthetize me to an untenable situation for far too long. I’m glad I have been free of it for more than a decade. I call that medication the “shut that bitch up” prescription. So glad you have managed to remain sober. Good for you.
This was an eye opener for me. I was also fired when I was a top performer. In my case it was because my new manager didn’t want a woman on his team. I was the only woman. Now I wonder if it also had something to do with my success.
I was hired by a rival company the next day. They’d been chasing me to work for them for years.
Even so, it took months to get over the PTSD of being fired. And it cost me a lot of money because I had to start over. The company I left lost one of its top performers. There’s no logic only ego.
I admire you for all that you have achieved despite the issues you had to overcome. Thank you for telling your stories.
And that’s why I’m self employed. I too once worked in finance in the 90’s and it was ugly, many times I was one of two women outside admin. Ugh it’s a miracle I leave the house at all lol
Am also learning to avoid PTSD trigger bringing me down by giving thanks in the circumstance. Otherwise i get loudly angry in private. I don’t always succeed.
My son went through something similar. I watched him fight back and not allow them to degrade him. Sadly though we as parents felt every single poke and joke. We went through hell supporting him. We still wear the wounds.
Cody, this isn’t just a story—it’s scripture for the survivors. You walked through corporate hell with a target on your back and still had the audacity to glow. That alone threatened them. Because nothing terrifies small men like someone who rises without their permission.
Your words carry the weight of a gospel: the gospel of grit, clarity, and not drinking the Kool-Aid just to keep a job. You didn't just endure—you named it. That’s sacred work. That’s exorcism.
May your story be the fire that burns through every HR-manufactured illusion. May it be the mirror that shows the next Cody they are not alone. And may those motherfuckers choke on the footnotes of their nondisclosure agreements.
Thank you for writing this. You totally hit the nail on the head with the storytelling and interpretation. It’s great to hear that you came through, survived, and now advocate for other people! I hope that feels empowering, after all of the pain.
It’s amazing the pain people can cause with this type of manipulation. People will do absolutely awful things to not face their own insecurities, and they’ll do incredible mental backbends to avoid any culpability after the fact, because denial of reality is their objective. It’s quite sad, because they truly must hate themselves, and they’ll try to destroy anyone who reminds them of that. The best choice is always to “get away,” but like you pointed out, this is so pervasive. I guess we just hold on to the good people even more tightly!
I lived through this as well, and I already had PTSD from military sexual trauma. The gaslighting, the secrecy, condescension, backstabbing, for 12 years. I wish I had left so much earlier. You are brave Cody, thank you for your story!
Blown away by your situation and your observations.
I've been sober over 30 years now and also had traumatic childhood events that colored my life. I'm just breaking away from it all. I want to leave my job in healthcare because Ive seen enough death and suffering, so sick of management making six figures and higher , while those of us actually SAVING LIVES get a 1- 2% raise, 3% if you jump through the hoops every year which at 64 years of age... Fk that, forget it.
I want to walk out of there and just do energy work with horses but building clientele takes time. I put it in the capable hands of Source, the Universe, Spirit.
You have such a gift with your writing, I hope you can escape the Corporate Vampire World and live off your gift as I wish to do.
I admire your perseverance, tenacity, and resilience.
However, I hope you don’t overestimate the amount of support that people like me are willing to offer to anyone whose ‘success’ comes from working in finance or insurance.
These businesses kill millions and strangle culture and freedom. I’m sure there are plenty if stories like yours at Wells Fargo too. There’s only so much empathy I can muster for people who make their livings in this manner.
I’m gonna be honest I couldn’t follow the whole story, but I got the general sentiment Cody and this is EXACTLY what I’m going through now being in a PhD program. It was this realization that Imbeing manipulated that subconsciously pushed me back to faith. I didn’t even realize it. And I now have a clarity that scares those who want to use me. Yet, I remain kind and gentle, because I can never allow this system to take away my softness, I can never ever allow it to brutalize me. Never. Ever ever.
I switched jobs 8 times in 10 years because of bosses like you described, Cody. They are almost everywhere.
I never engaged, I only observed, listened to others and then prepared my exit. It was exhausting, constantly starting over again.
One thing I observed at all of these employers: Those bosses and their bosses and HR, they are all in it together. It's them against everyone below them. They understand that they need to stick together, appear as one force. This way it is much harder for anyone to go after them.
A lot of them are grossly incompetent, but that's exactly why they are in those positions. They take instructions and will do anything, to stay in the position of power that they are in. Why? I think they know that they are incompetent, dumb and useless and that in nature they would never reach a level where they would be in charge of anything. They are the ones that get pushed around and pushed away, the bottom of the bottom feeders. But in the upside down world we are living in, those types of people always get promoted to the very top, because they are the most perfect puppets. They will do anything for having power over the people who they envy.
The only option I see for us people who know how to do actual work and achieve something, we also need to stick together. We also need to be one force. But not in a way where those two forces then collide. Then we would be like them. No, we need to be Trojan horses. Bullshit our ways to the very top. Those other folks need to think we are 100% one of them, no doubt in their minds. Then, once at the very top, we need to reveal our ture force and make them pay. They are prepared for a head on fight, not for a silent takeover behind the scenes.
KD, I so appreciate your clarity and your experience.
I agree wholeheartedly on your assessment of why these people make it to the top being puppets and what a 'click' it is. Ugh! Insidious and sickening.
But I have a filter that I can't live pretending or bullshiting on that level, I could NEVER do it. That does not exist in my nature. I simply CANNOT.
So I search for my escape, asking Spirit to handle my obstacles and relaxing into that faith because for me there is no other option.
Wow…just wow. Man, I love not being reliant on any substances. I love it more than words can say. I think it is far easier to maintain control over people who indulge in substances, even those that are prescribed by physicians. I had a shrink many years ago who prescribed Klonipin for anxiety. It served to anesthetize me to an untenable situation for far too long. I’m glad I have been free of it for more than a decade. I call that medication the “shut that bitch up” prescription. So glad you have managed to remain sober. Good for you.
This was an eye opener for me. I was also fired when I was a top performer. In my case it was because my new manager didn’t want a woman on his team. I was the only woman. Now I wonder if it also had something to do with my success.
I was hired by a rival company the next day. They’d been chasing me to work for them for years.
Even so, it took months to get over the PTSD of being fired. And it cost me a lot of money because I had to start over. The company I left lost one of its top performers. There’s no logic only ego.
I admire you for all that you have achieved despite the issues you had to overcome. Thank you for telling your stories.
EGO...exactly!
And that’s why I’m self employed. I too once worked in finance in the 90’s and it was ugly, many times I was one of two women outside admin. Ugh it’s a miracle I leave the house at all lol
in-house
Am also learning to avoid PTSD trigger bringing me down by giving thanks in the circumstance. Otherwise i get loudly angry in private. I don’t always succeed.
Blessings!
My son went through something similar. I watched him fight back and not allow them to degrade him. Sadly though we as parents felt every single poke and joke. We went through hell supporting him. We still wear the wounds.
I love people that won't shut up! ❤️
Cody, this isn’t just a story—it’s scripture for the survivors. You walked through corporate hell with a target on your back and still had the audacity to glow. That alone threatened them. Because nothing terrifies small men like someone who rises without their permission.
Your words carry the weight of a gospel: the gospel of grit, clarity, and not drinking the Kool-Aid just to keep a job. You didn't just endure—you named it. That’s sacred work. That’s exorcism.
May your story be the fire that burns through every HR-manufactured illusion. May it be the mirror that shows the next Cody they are not alone. And may those motherfuckers choke on the footnotes of their nondisclosure agreements.
I’m thinking of the recent SS post about how HR is not necessary.
Thank you for sharing this. Coming from a man it may finally sink in to people. This needs to be called out over and over.
The corporate patriarchal system circles around the abusers. It’s just what they do.
I applaud and admire your courage and persistence to overcome and thrive. It’s a rough road but well worth the outcomes. Bravo.
They sure didn’t listen to others.
Thank you for writing this. You totally hit the nail on the head with the storytelling and interpretation. It’s great to hear that you came through, survived, and now advocate for other people! I hope that feels empowering, after all of the pain.
It’s amazing the pain people can cause with this type of manipulation. People will do absolutely awful things to not face their own insecurities, and they’ll do incredible mental backbends to avoid any culpability after the fact, because denial of reality is their objective. It’s quite sad, because they truly must hate themselves, and they’ll try to destroy anyone who reminds them of that. The best choice is always to “get away,” but like you pointed out, this is so pervasive. I guess we just hold on to the good people even more tightly!
I lived through this as well, and I already had PTSD from military sexual trauma. The gaslighting, the secrecy, condescension, backstabbing, for 12 years. I wish I had left so much earlier. You are brave Cody, thank you for your story!
Blown away by your situation and your observations.
I've been sober over 30 years now and also had traumatic childhood events that colored my life. I'm just breaking away from it all. I want to leave my job in healthcare because Ive seen enough death and suffering, so sick of management making six figures and higher , while those of us actually SAVING LIVES get a 1- 2% raise, 3% if you jump through the hoops every year which at 64 years of age... Fk that, forget it.
I want to walk out of there and just do energy work with horses but building clientele takes time. I put it in the capable hands of Source, the Universe, Spirit.
You have such a gift with your writing, I hope you can escape the Corporate Vampire World and live off your gift as I wish to do.
All the best to you.
I followed the story and I am a big fan. Great advice. These bottom dwelling gaslighters are the ugly truth. Keep speaking
and thriving.
I admire your perseverance, tenacity, and resilience.
However, I hope you don’t overestimate the amount of support that people like me are willing to offer to anyone whose ‘success’ comes from working in finance or insurance.
These businesses kill millions and strangle culture and freedom. I’m sure there are plenty if stories like yours at Wells Fargo too. There’s only so much empathy I can muster for people who make their livings in this manner.
Thank you!